Things You Should Know About Orange County CA Child Divorce

By Matthew Brown


Divorce is never easy particularly to children. Whether the children are in their teen or are young, many kids are not able to process how the people they look up to are getting divorced. In most cases, these kids will turn to the very parents for support. This explains why even when parents are dealing with their personal stress, they should have room for their kids. It is the duty of these parents to help the kids go through the changes that come with separation successfully. Below are tips on how you can assist your children cope with Orange county CA child divorce.

First, you need to be open to your kids. Many parents make the mistake of assuming that their children are not yet old enough to understand things. However, this is not the case. Even small children are able to know when there is a problem in the family. In case the parents stop sleeping in the same bedroom or when one parent decides to vacate the house, kids can easily notice.

Maintain constant communication with your children. Kids are very inquisitive. When they are feeling insecure they will have so many questions about the changes they are about to experience after separation. You should never get tired of talking to your kids. Be willing to answer every question that the kids might have. If the kids stop expressing themselves to you, consider approaching him or her.

Offer your child reassurance. Once you tell the kids about your intent to separate, reassure them that despite your marriage coming to an end, you will still be their parents. You should not reassure them once and then stop. Make it an ongoing process. This is because some insecurity may sneak on over time, but you need to let them that your separation has nothing to do with them.

Avoid badmouthing your ex. Speaking negatively about your ex to be can easily undermine the security of your child. The best way to show your kids that you are there for them is by working together, especially on issues of parenting. You may be against the parenting style of your ex, bit you should reproach him or her when your children are not there. Remember that the children love both of you and any wrong done to any of you hurts the kids.

Do not drag your kids into your issues. Avoid treating your child like messengers. Avoid using your kids to manipulate your ex. The aim is to keep the environment for your kids stable as you can. Also, allow your children to grieve. Appreciate that your child will in one way or the other feel the loss.

Sometimes you may need to ask for help. There are numerous resources that can help kids handle separation. In case you feel that you will require assistance to get the children via this difficult situation consider asking for help. Many counselors specialize in separation and how it affects kids.

Be careful about yourself. You should not allow yourself to be an emotional wretch after the separation. This is because your kids are looking on you for power to continue. If you are not strong, the kids cannot find the source of strength that they need.




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